So the other half and I have been talking about moving in together for a while now. I genuinley feel like I’m ready to take the next step in our relationship, and I’m excited to get started. That being said though, I’m a human being and I have scaredy-cat tendencies. It’s all well and good daydreaming about wallpaper patterns and imagining the benefits to our relationship, but I’m sure it’s completely natural to have doubts.
Here are my main worries about moving out of my family home:
1. Saying goodbye to all-night Netflix binges
I heard a rumor that, when you’re in a functioning adult relationship, you go to bed at the same time. Unless it’s a show that you’re both really into, you’ll be saying goodbye to watching The Office and Sons Of Anarchy into the early hours of the morning. Granted, this could be seen as a positive in terms of having a healthy sleeping pattern, but it also means you’re letting go of the one thing that keeps you feeling like a teenager.
2. Your mum’s not there when you’re sick
Assuming that you’re in a long-term relationship, your other half has probably got to the basics of how to take care of you when you’re sick. That being said though, your mum’s been there for you LITERALLY since you were born, and she’s the only one who knows the exact steps to make you feel better. You know you shouldn’t be phased by this because ‘you’re not a baby’, except when you’re ill, you kind of are. And you want your mommy.
3. What is money?
I swear that they should have taught a ‘basic sh*t you need to know to be a functioning human being’ module in school, because I know nothing about building a home. How can I afford a washing machine, sofa and double bed? How much is toilet roll? How often will I need to buy it? Do we split the cost of stamps? I don’t even need stamps, he should buy his own!
4. Saying goodbye to date night
This is a legit fear. Moving in together, especially as a young couple just starting out, means that you’re going to be scrimping and saving until to cows come home. Suddenly the £30-odd quid you’d spend bi-weekly on ‘date night’ seems like such a waste when it could have been spent on your lecky bill. Sharing a Tesco Dine In For Two while Coronation Street’s on seems like a step down.
5. Am I annoying?
It’s all well and good spending time with your other half on a planned basis, but when you’re under each others feet constantly, you fear that they’ll start to find all of your ‘quirky traits’ annoying. He might find it totes adorbz that you eat your pizza with a knife and fork now, but when you’ve been bickering about leaving the toilet seat up and which curtains to buy, it could easily turn into something that he’d consider suffocating you in your sleep for.
6. I pump. A lot.
It’s easy to pretend when you inhabit separate abodes that you’re a beautiful, hairless unicorn whose backside smells like rainbows. The reality is, you’re just as gross (if not more) than him, and it’s a lot harder to hide your burps, farts and poops from him in such close proximity. Here’s to hoping he finds it funny.
7. You might become boring
Right now, you can still ‘hang’. You’ll go out drinking until 3 A.M, play pool until your hearts content and hold interesting conversations. What if, when you move in together, you’re so consumed with curtain prices and the proper way to do hospital corners and it’s all you can talk about and you end up being so boring that your friends LITERALLY DIE. What if you LITERALLY kill your friends DEAD from boredom?
8. What’s his is yours… unfortunately
Personally, my boyfriend owns six guitars. That’s right, SIX guitars. It doesn’t matter that he hasn’t touched these guitars the whole time we’ve been together, 5/6 still have their own separate displays and are placed in his living space accordingly. I don’t know about any of my female readers, but my dream home does not consist of walls upon walls of different types of guitar. This works vice versa, of course, as I have a lot of crap too. My Cosmopolitan collection goes back about five years… does he want THOSE displayed in our living room? I’m guessing no.
9. Inevitable arguments
As a couple. we’re pretty zen. This has a lot to do with the fact that he’s so laid-back that he’s practically horizontal, and refuses to take the bait when I’m on a hormonal rampage and trying to start an argument. What if this changes when we move in together? What if I’m having my time-of-the-month mini-rage and he actually. God forbid, talks back to me? I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle it. I’ve become accustomed to a certain type of life, and that includes getting my own way most of the time.
10. The pressure is on
We’ve been taught that life and relationships are supposed to go a certain way. You date, you move in, you get engaged, you get a dog (totally on-board with this, FYI), you get married, you have BABIES. Since you’re taking the second step, it’s natural to worry that everything else is going to start snowballing. I CAN’T GET MARRIED YET, I’M NOT A SIZE 12. I can get a dog though. Totally. Let’s do that first, before we buy furniture.
At the end of the day though, this is inevitably part of growing up. It’s something everyone will (hopefully) have to face at some point or another, and it usually turns out to be pretty great. Personally, I’m looking forward to having unlimited #BaeTime and making a house into our home.
What are your moving out fears? Do you have any advice for beating the fear? Let me know in the comments below, or on Twitter at @dimmickhead.